Saturday, June 11, 2011
Time
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
93
Honestly, today was harder than I expected. It was beautiful but rough. I didn't expect to get so emotional. Grandpa had been in a care center for the last few years, his memory was not great, he could hardly hear, and he was no longer mobile. Though it was sad to see him like this we knew he wouldn't be around for too much longer. When my Dad called to tell me he had passed away I was sad but mostly resigned. Being too young to appreciate my time with him when he was functional and his continued deterioration made it hard for me to feel close to him by the time he died. I was initially disappointed that I wasn't more sad about his passing. Thankfully, the funeral service and picture displays helped me to remember the times I was close to him and who he was before his body let him down. As my dad spoke about his father and his brothers shared their thoughts I was overwhelmed by the muddled memories I have of my grandpa and how their words of respect and admiration rang true of the man I remembered.
I have the most amazing family. Just watching and listening to everything done and said today reminded me of that. There aren't many families that are as close as ours but the bond between my dad and his seven brothers is so impressive. They are a sight to see when they are together. Every one of them is over six feet tall, they are loud, obnoxious, and stubborn. All of them are brilliant, hardworking, and hilarious. But they are so different and that's what makes their love and support of each other so great. My beautiful cousin said something to me that totally struck a chord. We were talking about how we wish we could've been closer with grandpa the last few years and she said how the best way we can feel like we know grandpa is to recognize the way his sons, our dads, have lived their lives. I can't express how much this reminder means to me. My dad is such an amazing person as are my uncles and when I think about the things I do know and remember of my grandpa and how much greater those attributes would be when he was raising my dad I have a greater understanding of what we lost this week.
I am so grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ in my life. The knowledge that I will get to see my grandpa again and the grandma I never knew. That I still have the opportunity to really get to know them. I can't imagine losing the people I love and not having that reassurance to bring peace and joy. I love my family and am thankful I get to spend the rest of eternity with them and my Heavenly Father.
I love you Grandpa!
It's good to be King :)
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Ugh
Monday, March 21, 2011
On to a New Adventure
But seriously, I've pretty much planned on a mission my entire life. Then I got to college... Did you know it's a lot harder and more complicated to drop everything in your third year of school then it seems? Anyway, I wasn't sure if a mission was going to work out for me but I still had over 2 years until I had to decide so I kind of left it in the back of my mind. It was still enough of an option that I always included it in my future plans as a possibility but I still wasn't sure if it would happen.
Fast forward to December 2010. I had just turned 21 the month before, had yet to officially declare my major, and definitely hadn't decided on a mission. Over Christmas break all would be decided. My wonderful friends from high school put a breakfast together so we could all catch up with one another. It was so great to see everyone together again and to hear about all the amazing things they were doing with their lives. All of them are so on top of things and were making such good decisions. They made me realize I needed to get things figured out. So, I figured I'd set up an appointment with my home ward Bishop just to chat and get his advice on things. Like 2 days after I made this decision I got a text, "Hi Lauren, this is Bishop Jardine. I hope you have had a good Christmas. I was wondering if you would be willing to meet with me this Sunday?"
Well that was easy enough! I responded that I had been hoping to meet with him anyway and Sunday would work perfect. I have to say it kind of freaked me out that he had been the one to set up our appointment. Going in I was pretty sure a mission would come up since he really didn't need to meet with me as I have my own Bishop down at BYU but I wasn't sure what to expect. After saying our "hello's" we sat down and the first thing out of his mouth was, "Lauren, have you thought about serving a mission?" I told him that that is why I had wanted to meet with him. He said he'd never asked a sister that before but he felt like he should with me. He said it was completely my choice but that he felt I would do a great job if I did choose to serve.
That was pretty much all I needed to push me in the right direction. We decided that I should start filling out my papers and I would know if it wasn't what I was supposed to do. After our chat I was about 90% sure that I was supposed to go on a mission but as that was my first real search for an answer I figured I should probably add a bit more personal thought and prayer into it before I said it was a sure thing.
My reasons for going on a mission:
I've always wanted to
I'd regret it if I didn't
Nothing is standing in the way:
- Again, no boys so the higher priority of marriage is not in the way :)
- I go to BYU so school is not an issue
I want to improve my academic and spiritual discipline and I think a mission would help
To live away from home
To experience the world from a different point of view
To learn a language
There are other reasons but of course the main reason is that I've always wanted to have more opportunities to share the things that I know about this life and the next (BYU isn't exactly optimal for that). To give others the chance to have what I have and to experience the blessings that can be available to them and to do something to repay my Heavenly Father even a tiny bit for everything He has done for me.
So my reasons to go list covers pretty much everything so it's pretty clear I should and need to go. There are reasons for me to stay. They sound dumb, even to me, but they are the things that I will have the hardest time sacrificing. Reasonable things aren't even on this list, I'm almost embarrassed at what I'm worried about missing but here are some:
- Lives of friends and family. I have a feeling that the next year or so is going to mean marriage or baby for many a friend or cousin and it is honestly hard for me to know I will miss out on those things or even smaller things like my brother's games or performances.
- Sports seasons, auditions and shows, things that don't happen exactly the same twice. Completely irrational I know.
- Fear of losing skills like voice, dance, acting, etc.
Obviously all selfish, worldly, dumb, dumb reasons. I didn't even have the normal worry of most sister missionaries apparently. My Stake President asked if I had any fears or worries and I told him that it was hard knowing I was missing out on things. He assumed that I was afraid of missing out on dating and marriage hahaha. I laughed at that one. Definitely not worried about that. I explained what I meant and also let him know my basic history with men. We enjoyed a shared chuckle at my expense ;)
Anyway, the minute I figured out my logic for possibly not going I knew there was no way I wasn't going. So here I am excited, anxious, nervous, and truly confident in my decision. Since I realized there was nothing worthwhile holding me back it has gotten so much easier to let all those reasons go. When I think about the things I will miss I don't get sad about it and those things no longer seem as important. I know I am ready for this and I know Heavenly Father is helping me to see the bigger picture and to forget myself a little more each day.
Can't wait for tomorrow!
P.S. I need to thank this guy for the wonderful basketball season he has given me before I leave. I really enjoyed our elevator ride the other day Jimmer. Good luck in the Sweet Sixteen!
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Understanding
Sunday, September 12, 2010
The One Good Thing to Come Out of the Twilight Phenomenon
So this guy, Dan, is a writer for Sparknotes. He's probably in his mid-twenties, attractive, and absolutely hilarious. Apparently the editors at Sparknotes found out he was one of the only people at Sparknotes that had never read or seen anything regarding Twilight so they asked him to read the series and blog about it as he went along. Genius!
Chapter One: Party
Better title: My Kingdom for a Band-Aid
The lovebirds walk into the house, and are greeted by everyone shouting, "Happy birthday!" The house is decorated with pink roses, silver, and crystal. It's very impressive, but a properly planned Dora the Explorer-themed party could be just as classy, and twice as fun.
Bella responds to the decorations and all the attention by telling us, "It was a hundred times worse than I'd imagined." After reading that sentence, I've decided that Bella is the worst character in literature, beating out Nurse Ratchet from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and Dr. Doom from The Fantastic Four. What an ungrateful, horrible, lousy person.
Emmett is happy to see Bella, but quickly excuses himself with a wink and goes outside. Alice and Jasper greet Bella, and Jasper, who still loves human blood a bit too much, acts distant and odd. Alice then says it's time to open presents, and gives Bella a box. There is nothing inside. The box contained a new stereo for Bella's truck, which Emmett ran out to install so that Bella wouldn't be able to return the gift. How tricky.
Alice then gives Bella another present to open, this one from Edward. She gives him a mean stare, but he assures her that he didn't spend any money on the gift. As she opens the present, the wrapping paper cuts her finger, and all hell breaks loose.
Edward screams, "No!" Jasper gets his hungry eyes and charges at Bella, and Edward comes running over and pushes her out of the way and over a table, crashing into some glassware (side note: Why do vampires have glassware? I thought most of their meals were eaten on the go). Jasper runs into Edward, creating a loud, rock-like sound. The amazing Emmett then holds Jasper back. As Bella looks around, she realizes the crash caused a more severe cut on her hand, and now she has six hungry vampires staring down at her.
Prediction: (This is Dan's prediction for the next chapter, probably my favorite part of each post) Jasper shouts "Five-second rule!" before diving for Bella's blood on the floor. Later, Bella nicks her leg while shaving. Jasper goes nuts, but Edward protects Bella. The insane, ravenous Jasper kills hundreds of people in his maddened state of bloodlust. The next day he apologizes to Bella and offers her a bottle of Nair with a sheepish grin. All is forgiven.
Anyway, go check it out...
http://community.sparknotes.com/index.php/2009/07/16/blogging-twilight-index-page/
Cool Beans
Lo